Club Hellven
by Raven Silvers
Summary: Even Muses need a break, every so often...and what better place to go than to Club Hellven?
1. Night Fever

A/N: Taking a break from some work, and this is the result...Enjoy. (Song: **Night Fever**, by the **Bee Gees**)

* * *

*phone goes "ringring" in Hellven*   
Sethoz: *picks it up* 'lo? 

Raven: *on the other end* It's a Friday! It's time to _partay__!_

Sethoz: No need to shou — 

Clez: *bursts into the room* The Club's open!

  
Ash: It's open? Since when?

  
Clez: Since today! 

  
All: Oooh!

Clez: Get ready! *grabs the phone from Sethoz* Raven! Get the car here!

  
Raven: I'm already on my way. Be there in ten?

  
Clez: *nods and puts down the phone* *joins in with the others in running around, trying to get ready to go to The Club, the hottest place in town* 

Ash: *throws Sethoz a glittery dress* 

Listen to the ground:  
there is movement all around.  
There is something goin' down  
and I can feel it

  
Sethoz: *looks at dress, and chucks it somewhere* *pulls out a green one* 

On the waves of the air  
there is dancin' out there  
If it's somethin' we can share  
we can steal it

  
Clez: *picks up a nice red dress* *holds it to her chest, looking dreamy as she thinks of someone*   
And that sweet city man  
He moves through the light  
Controlling my mind and my soul  
When you reach out for me  
Yeah, and the feelin' is bright

*takes out a photo of Tom Sawyer and sighs dreamily*

  
Sethoz: *runs around, trying to get her hair done*   
Then I get night fever, night fever  
We know how to do it  
Gimme that night fever, night fever  
We know how to show it

Raven: *comes into the room, dressed in a really pretty silver dress*   
Here I am  
Prayin' for this moment to last  
Livin' on the music so fine  
Borne on the wind  
Makin' it mine

Ash: *pulls out a navy blue dress, and examines it closely*  
Night fever, night fever  
We know how to do it  
Gimme that night fever, night fever  
We know how to show it

Raven: *sits down as her friends run around* *pulls out a tattered photo of Rodney Skinner from wallet*   
In the heat of our love  
Don't need no help for us to make it  
Gimme just enough to take us to the mornin'  
I got fire in my mind  
I got higher in my walkin'  
And I'm glowin' in the dark  
I give you warnin'

Sethoz: *peeks inside wallet, not letting anyone see the picture inside*  
And that sweet city man  
He moves through the light  
Controlling my mind and my soul  
When you reach out for me  
Yeah, and the feelin' is bright 

Ash:  *smiles as she glances at a framed picture of Dorian getting dunked, which is resting, proudly, on the wall*   
Then I get night fever, night fever  
We know how to do it  
Gimme that night fever, night fever  
We know how to show it

Clez and Sethoz: *come out of the changing room at the same time, in matching green and red dresses*  
Here I am  
Prayin' for this moment to last  
Livin' on the music so fine  
Borne on the wind  
Makin' it mine

  
Ash and Raven: 

Night fever, night fever  
We know how to do it  
Gimme that night fever, night fever  
We know how to show it

Raven: So, ladies, are you done? Can we _finally _go to the club?

Sethoz: Three months of renovations, and I suffer from withdrawal.

Clez: Where's the car? 

  
Ash: It's time to party, at _Club Hellven_!

* * *

A/N: Flame me. Go ahead, I'm waiting for them...*hides in fire-proof bunker* 


	2. She's Getting Rushes

A/N: I'm suffering from fanfiction withdrawal symptoms, I swear. I need to write something, or I'll go crazy. 

* * *

Raven: Aaaye, Club Hellven is _back in action! _

All: *crowd around a table and take their seats* *serving guy comes over and they order their drinks* 

*door opens*   
  
Sethoz: *nearly spills her tequila on Clez when she sees her League honey* 

Ash: *waves* Hey, guys. Join us! *they do, and Skinner's sitting next to Raven* 

  
Raven: *goes goo-goo eyed* 

Tom: *is sitting next to Clez*   
  
Clez: *is trying hard not to become like Raven*

Jekyll: *sits next to Sethoz* 

  
Sethoz: *nearly drops her drink* 

Dorian: *is sitting next to Ash*  
  
Ash: *is planning her next prank on him* 

MC: Welcome, one and all, to the new and improved Club Hellven! We've been closed this past three months, since we were doin' some work to make the Club a nicer place. *goes on about some rubbish*

Skinner: *prods Tom* 

Tom: What?  
  


Skinner: I'm gonna get drinks. Come with me.

Tom: Sure. 

Clez: *watches Tom's retreating back*
    
    He's got a blind smile and a soft touch
    
    A cute little dimple when he laughs too much
    
    They say you fall hard when you meet him
    
    Such is his allure
    
    Ash: *stirs her cocktail with the little umbrella toothpick*
    
    He's got a quick wit and a fast tongue
    
    But he doesn't seem to know that he's the one
    
    They say he cheats charm when he whispers
    
    He's devilishly pure
    
    You'd see if you knew him
    
    He doesn't know
    
    But its time Clez told him so
    
    Raven: *rests elbow on tabletop* *puts head in palm* 
    
    When she see his blushes
    
    From a compliment of hers it touches
    
    Something inside, she's getting rushes
    
    The adrenaline rushes
    
    And she's fascinated
    
    That he really don't know how to take it
    
    When she look at him that way he feels naked
    
    She's so into him
    
    She's getting rushes
    
    Clez: *is fantasizing* 
    
    Sethoz: *amused look*
    
    He's about five nine 
    
    Got a sexy stride
    
    With long tanned legs that he shouldn't hide
    
    With a fine air of innocence
    
    Nonchalance in every move
    
    He's a sweet sensation tease temptation
    
    Clez: *sighs*  
    
    He looks good enough to eat
    
    He's a fallen angel with a devilish streak
    
    And so they say
    
    Like with like will finally meet
    
    You'd see if you knew him
    
    He doesn't know
    
    But its time I told him so
    
      
    
    Ash, Raven, and Sethoz:  
    
    When she see his blushes
    
    From a compliment of hers it touches
    
    Something inside, she's getting rushes
    
    The adrenaline rushes
    
    And she's fascinated
    
    That he really don't know how to take it
    
    When she look at him that way he feels naked
    
    She's so into him
    
    She's getting rushes
    
    Clez: *softly*
    
    When I like it and I want more
    
    And I like it and I want more
    
    And I like it and I want more 
    
    Never felt it like this before
    
    It's more than adrenaline rushes
    
    It's the touch and the smell of skin rushes
    
    Some call it "love at first sight" 

I call it "butterflies"

Ash, Raven, and Sethoz:
    
    When she see his blushes
    
    From a compliment of hers it touches
    
    Something inside, she's getting rushes
    
    The adrenaline rushes
    
    And she's fascinated
    
    That he really don't know how to take it
    
    When she look at him that way he feels naked
    
    She's so into him
    
    She's getting rushes

  
*Skinner and Tom return with drinks for all, and Raven nearly faints at the sight of her honey*  


	3. Rhythm of the Night

Song: **Rhythm of the Night** by **Valeria**, off the **Moulin Rouge!** soundtrack

* * *

*While Raven and Clez go crazy over their men, and Ash plots her dastardly prank against Dorian, Sethoz is getting restless*   
  
Sethoz: Hey, Henry?  
  
Jekyll: Yes, Miss Sethoz? 

Sethoz: Don't call me Miss, you. Wanna dance? 

Jekyll: *looks unsure*   
  
Sethoz: Oh, c'mon. *pulls Jekyll up as she rises from her seat* *leads him to the dance floor*

The band on stage: 

I believe you were expecting me

Let's dance

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Forget about the worries on your mind

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Forget about the worries on your mind

Sethoz: 

When it feels like

The world is on your shoulders

And all of the madness

Has got you goin' crazy

It's time to get out

Step out into the street

Where all of the action

Is right there at your feet

Well...

Ash: 

She knows a place where you can

Dance the whole night away

And it's called the Club Hellven

Just go with her and you can

shake your blues right away

You'll be doing fine once the music starts

Clez and Raven: 

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Dance until the morning light

Forget about the worries on your mind

You can leave them all behind

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Oh the rhythm of the night..

Forget about the worries on your mind

You can leave them all behind

Sethoz: 

Look out on the street now

The party's just beginning

The music's playing

A celebration's starting

Under the street  lights

A scene is being set

A night for romance

A night you won't forget

So...

Skinner: 

Come join the fun

This ain't no time to be staying at home

The Hellvenians are going on yeah

Tonight is gonna be a night like you've never known

We're gonna have a good time the whole night long

Oh yeah...

Tom and Clez: *also go on the dancefloor* 

To the beat of the rhythm of the night

Dance until the morning light

Forget about the worries on your mind

We can leave them all behind

To the beat of the rhythm of the night

Oh the rhythm of the night..

Forget about the worries on your mind

We can leave them all behind

  
Raven: 

Cuando sientes que el mundo esta encima de t

y la vida te tiene como loca,

conozco un lugar donde podemos bailar

*beams* 

Ash: *whispers to Mina* She finally got her Spanish right...

Skinner: *pulls Raven up and onto the dancefloor* 

Raven and Skinner: 

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Dance until the morning light

Forget about the worries on your mind

We can leave them all behind

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Forget about the worries on your mind

We can leave them all behind

Tom and Clez: 

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Forget about the worries on your mind

We can leave them all behind

Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night

Oh the rhythm of the night..

Forget about the worries on your mind

We can leave them all behind

Sethoz: 

Oh rhythm

Wanna feel the rhythm


	4. El Tango De Raven

A/N: I'm going crazy, I swear.

* * *

*Jekyll is taken away by Sethoz's magnificent beauty, and Clez is cracking jokes with Tom. While Ash is scheming against Dorian, Dorian stands up and offers to dance with Raven just as the band puts on not-so-clubby music*

Skinner: *watches in jealousy as Raven is led to the dance floor*

Band on stage:  
Will drive you   
Will drive you   
Will drive you  
…Mad 

Dorian: *twirls Raven around*  
Raven, you don't have to put on that creative light   
Write the streets for money   
You don't care if it's wrong or if it is right  
Raven, you don't have to wear that dress tonight  
Raven, you don't have to sell your work to the bad   
*gives Raven a peck on the cheek*

Skinner: *is sipping his drink, but it's obvious he's watching — jealously*  
His eyes upon your face   
His hand upon your hand   
His lips caress your skin   
It's more than I can stand 

Dorian and band:   
Raven 

Raven: *is not sure what to make of this*

Skinner: *softly*  
Why does my heart cry? 

Dorian & Backing:   
Raven 

Skinner:   
Feelings I can't fight   
You're free to leave me   
But just don't deceive me   
And please   
Believe me when I say   
I love you   
*looks wistful as Raven and Dorian tango*

Band on stage:   
Yo que te quiero tanto, que voy a hacer?   
Me dejaste...me dejaste como una paloma   
El alma se me fue; se me fue el corazon   
Ya no tengo ganas de vivir porque no te puedo convencer   
Que no te vendas, Raven (#1)

Dorian:   
Raven – you don't have to put on that red light 

Skinner: *face twists in jealousy*    
Why does my heart cry?   
Feelings I can't fight   
*stands up*

Dorian: *is still dancing with Raven, but faster now*   
You don't have to wear that dress tonight   
Raven – you don't have to put on that red light 

Skinner:   
Why does my heart cry? 

Dorian:   
Raven – you don't have to wear that dress tonight 

Skinner:   
Feelings I can't fight 

Skinner, Dorian & Ash:   
RAVEN! 

Raven: *trips over the trail of her dress and is caught by Skinner* 

* * *

(#1) English translation:  
And I who love you so much; what am I going to do?   
You left me...you left me like a dove   
My soul has left me; my heart has left me   
I no longer wish to live because I cannot convince you   
Not to sell yourself, Raven

A/N: Don't ask me why I did this. All I know is that I need drama. Lots of it. 


	5. Jellicle Cats

A/N: Whoops. I've just realised I didn't put down what song the previous chapter came from, so the previous (which is "El Tango De Raven", for those of you who have lousy memories -- yours truly included) is **El Tango De Roxanne**, from the **Moulin Rouge! **soundtrack. It's a great CD, and if you don't have it yet, you don't know what you're missing. Really!

* * *

  
*Skinner goes off to have a word with Dorian (a-_hem_) and Raven goes back to her seat, with the rest of the League*  
  


Ash: *looks drunk* 

  
Clez: Uh, Sethoz? Rave? I think Ash needs to go outside...

Ash: *muttering something about cats*

Sethoz: *helps Clez drag Ash to the outside of the club*

*Outside, the night is dark, but Hellven City's lights are bright and beautiful, lighting up the sky*  
  
Ash: *leans against the railing, looking down on the Vegas-like city, since the Club is located on a hill that looks over Hellven City*

Sethoz: *whispers to Clez* Are you sure she's not gonna fall?  
  


Clez: *whispers back* Nah. I think a song's coming along...

  
Ash: *takes a deep breath* 

_Are you blind when you're born?   
Can you see in the dark?_

_Dare you look at a king?   
Would you sit on his throne?_

_Can you say of your bite that it's worse than your bark?_

_Are you cock of the walk when you're walking alone?  
_  
Clez: __

_Because Jellicles are and Jellicles do_

_Jellicles__ do and Jellicles would_

_Jellicles__ would and Jellicles can_

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

Ash: *turns around, and it's obvious she's been hit by inspiration*

_When you fall on your head do you land on your feet?_

_Are you tense when you sense there's a storm in the air?_

_Can you find your way blind when you're lost in the street?_

_Do you know how to go to the Hellven-side Layer?_

Sethoz: 

_Because Jellicles can and Jellicles do_

_Jellicles__ do and Jellicles can_

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

_Jellicles__ do and Jellicles can_

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

Ash:

_Can you ride on a broomstick to places far distant?_

_Familiar with candle, with book and with bell?___

_Were you Whittington's friend?   
The Pied Piper's assistant?_

_Have you been an alumnus of Heaven and Hell?_

_Are you mean like a minx? Are you lean like a lynx?_

_Are you keen to be seen when you're smelling a rat?_

_Were you there when the pharoahs commissioned the sphinx?_

_If you were, and you are, you're a Jellicle cat_

Clez and Sethoz: 

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

Raven: *shudders* Cats are evil. 

Ash: 

_We can dive through the air like a flying trapeze_

_We can turn double sumersaults, bounce on a tire_

_We can run up a wall, we can swing through the trees_

_We can balance on bars, we can walk on a wire_

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

  
Clez:

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

  
Sethoz: 

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

Sethoz and Clez:

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

Ash:  
_Can you sing at the same time in more than one key_

_Duets by Rossini and waltzes by Strauss_

_And can you (as cats do) begin with a 'C'_

_That always triumphantly brings down the house?_

_Jellicle__ cats are queen of the nights_

_Singing at astronomical heights_

_Handling pieces from the Messiah_

_Hallelujah, angelical choir_

*she spreads her arms open wide and does the Titanic thing*

Ash:__

_The mystical divinity of unashamed felinity_

_Round the cathedral rang "Vivat,"_

_Life to the Everlasting Cat!_

_Feline, fearless, faithful and true_

_To others who do - what_

_Jellicles__ do and Jellicles can_

_Jellicles__ can and Jellicles do_

_Jellicle__ cats sing Jellicle chants_

_Jellicles__ old and Jellicles new_

Clez and Sethoz: __

_Jellicle__ song and Jellicle dance_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

Ash:

_Pactical__ cats, Dramatical cats!_

_Pragmatical__ cats, Fanatical cats!_

Raven: *horrified look* They're all evil! 

Sethoz:

_Oratorical cats, Delphicoracle cats!_

_Skeptical__ cats, Dispeptical cats!_

_Romantical__ cats, Penantical cats!_

Raven: *shudders* 

Clez: 

_Critical cats, Parasitical cats!_

_Allegorical cats, Metaphorical cats!_

_Statistical cats and Mystical cats!_

Ash, Clez and Sethoz: __

_Political cats, Hypocritical cats!_

_Clerical cats, Hysterical cats!_

_Cynical cats, Rabbinical cats!_

Raven: Cats are **evil**! *looks around to see if there's a cat*

Ash, Clez and Sethoz: 

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

_Jellicle__ songs for Jellicle cats_

Ash: *points at Dorian, who's at the entrance to the door of the Club*

_There's a man over there with a look of surprise_

_As much as to say "Well now, how about that?"___

_Do I actually see with my own very eyes_

_A man who's not heard of a Jellicle cat?_

_What's a Jellicle cat? What's a Jellicle cat?_

Dorian: *comes out* What _is _a Jellicle cat? 

Raven: You mean you don't know?! *all gasp*

Ash: *takes a deep breath and produces a rubber chicken from her coat* Die, Dorian! *chases Dorian into the distance* 

Raven: ...how does she run in those heels? 

* * *

  
Song: **Jellicle**** Cats** from the **Cats **soundtrack

A/N: …frankly, I have no idea what a Jellicle cat is, either. *runs off*


	6. Sethoz and Tom together!

Well, Sethoz, you wanted it. And here it is. **Graymoon74**, I might _just _consider that...

* * *

*all the Hellvenians are back inside Club Hellven* *Dorian looks dazed because Ash attacked him with a rubber chicken* 

Sethoz: *sighs* *looks at Tom* *downs another vodka* 

  
Raven: Don't get drunk, Sethoz...remember, you're driving us back. 

Sethoz: *shrugs* *is tipsy* 

Baby's black balloon makes him fly

I almost fell into that hole in him life

And you're not thinking about tomorrow

'Cause you were the same as me

But on your knees

Tom: *is also tipsy*

A thousand other boys could never reach you

How could I have been the one

I saw the world spin beneath you

And scatter like ice from the spoon

That was your womb

*raises glass in Sethoz's direction when Clez isn't looking (gasp!)*

Sethoz: *looks starry-eyed* 

Comin' down the world turned over

And angels fall without you there

Tom: 

And I go on as you get colder

Or are you someone's prayer

Raven: 

You know the lies they always told you

And the love you never knew

What's the things they never showed you

That swallowed the light from the sun

Inside your room, yeah

Sethoz and Tom: 

Comin' down the world turned over

And angels fall without you there

And I go on as you get colder

Always someone

And there's no time left for losin'

When you stand they fall, yeah

Clez: 

Comin' down the world turned over

And angels fall without you there

And I go on as you get colder

Ash: 

All because I'm

Comin' down the years turn over

And angels fall without you there

Sethoz and Tom:  

And I'll go on and I'll lead you home and

All because I'm

All because I'm

And I'll become

What you became to me

*look all goo-goo eyed at each other*   
  
Ash: Sethoz is drunk. 

Raven: Oh _yeah._

* * *

Song: **Black Balloon** by the **Goo Goo Dolls **


	7. Ash De Brie, Star!

A/N: What happens when boredom gets the better of you. 

* * *

Ash: -jumps up on a table- __

_The name on everybody's lips_

_Is gonna be De Brie _

_The lady raking in the chips_

_Is gonna be De Brie_

_I'm gonna be a celebrity_

-prances over to Dorian, who looks as if he doesn't know what a "celebrity" is-

_That means_

_Somebody everyone knows_

-flips Dorian's hat off using a finger, while her face is about an inch away from his- -puts in on and walks around in it, looking really sexy-  
  
Sethoz and Raven: -are hanging on to Dorian to make sure he doesn't try to kill Ash- 

Clez: __

_They're gonna recognize her eyes_

_Her hair _

_Her teeth _

_Her boobs_

_Her nose_

Skinner: __

_From just some dumb war god's wife_

_She's gonna be De Brie _

_Who says that song is not an art?_

Ash: -is twirling Dorian's hat around one finger- 

_And who in case her computer doesn't hang_

_Can say she started with a bang?_

_Ash De Brie! _

_Boys..._

Tom, Skinner, and Jekyll (the boys): __

_They're gonna wait outside in line_

_To get to see_

Ash: 

_De Brie_

_Think of those autographs_

_I'll sign_

_Good luck to ya_

Boys:    
_De Brie_

Raven:__

_And she'll appear _

_In a lavalier that goes _

_All the way down to her waist_

Boys: 

_Here a ring_

_There a ring_

_Everywhere a-ring-a-ling_

Sethoz:

_But always in the best of taste!_

Mina: 

_Mmmm__, she's a star!_

_And the audience loves her!_

_And she loves them_

_And they love her for loving them_

_And she loves them for loving her_

Sethoz:

_And they love each other_

_And that's because none of then_

_Got enough love in our childhoods_

Dorian: -to Ash-

_And that's showbiz_

_Kid_

Boys: __

_She's given up her hum drum life_

Ash: 

_I'm gonna be sing it_

  
  
Boys: __

_Ash De Brie_

_She made a scandal and a start_

Raven: She started Springtime! Whaddaya think?

Ash: 

_And Sophie Tucker will flip_

_I know_

_To see her name get billed below_

_Ash De Brie_

-poses with Dorian's hat on- 

Dorian: -makes a move to take it back- -is whacked by Sethoz, Clez and Raven using purple flowers- 


	8. Spanish Eyes

Raven is bad. Raven forgot to add in what song was used in the previous chapter. bonks self on head with purple flower The song was **Roxie**, off the **Chicago **soundtrack.

* * *

-Ash is being chased around by Dorian, who wants his hat back-

-Sethoz drops an ice cube down his back-

Jekyll: -watches as Dorian yelps and runs around, trying to get the ice cube out- -rests chin on palm and looks at Sethoz, who's laughing her guts out with the other Hellvenians-

Jekyll: -sighs-  
_I met a girl at the carnival  
__In Rio de Janeiro  
__We danced all night on the boulevard  
__In always we did the tango  
__I miss her lips  
__And the way she sashayed her hips  
__As she shook her shoulders  
__Somewhere in time she will come back to me  
__And I'll spend my whole life beside her_

Skinner: -pats his friend on the back- -looks at Raven-  
_They were dancing in the summer rain  
__They were dancing through the night  
__He never knew her real name  
_-refers back to Raven- -sighs-  
_So I called her Spanish Eyes  
__Spanish Eyes _

Tom: -leans in, watching Clez, and is breathless with her beauty-  
_I miss the touch  
__Of her hand so much  
__I long for the warmth inside her  
__Somewhere in time she will come  
__Back to me  
__And I'll spend my whole life beside her_

Tom, Jekyll and Skinner: -all three sigh and look at their honeys-   
_We were dancing in the summer rain  
__We were dancing through the night  
__I never knew her real name  
__So I called her Spanish Eyes  
__Spanish Eyes_

Jekyll: -looks wistfully at Sethoz, with the pitiful miserable look on his face-   
_We were dancin' through the summer rain   
__We were dancin' through the night  
__I never knew her real name  
__So I called her Spanish Eyes   
_-sighs wistfully-

* * *

Title: Spanish Eyes 

Artist: Ricky Martin


	9. Close Every Door

I've been having a bad time, and the past two weeks have been so bad it's not even funny. I don't have any religion, but I do believe in hope, loyalty and friendship.

* * *

Close every door to me  
Hide all the world from me   
Bar all the windows and shut out the light   
Do what you want with me  
Hate me and laugh at me   
Darken my daytime and torture my night   
  
If my life were important   
I would ask will I live or die   
But I know the answers lie far from this world   
  
Close every door to me  
Keep those I love from me   
Children of Imagination are never alone   
For I know I shall find my own peace of mind   
For I have been promised a land of my own  
  
Close every door to me, hide all the world from me   
Bar all the windows and shut out the light   
  
Just give me a number instead of my name   
Forget all about me and let me decay   
I do not matter   
I'm only one person   
Destroy me completely then throw me away   
  
If my life were important  
I would ask will I live or die   
But I know the answers lie far from this world   
  
Close every door to me keep those I love from me   
Children of Imagination are never alone   
For we know we shall find our own peace of mind   
For we have been promised a land of our own

* * *

**Song:** Close Every Door  
**Broadway:** Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Coat


	10. Our Very Own Mungojerrie and Rumpeltease...

Now, back to the happy stuff. We learn something about Tom and Skinner when they're drunk!

_

* * *

_

  
  
Skinner: -hiccups-

Tom: -leans over and whispers to Skinner-

Skinner: -grins-

Skinner and Tom: -jump onto the table, knocking over various empty bottles and glasses-  
_Tom Sawyer and Rodney Skinner   
We're a notorious couple of cats  
As knockabout clowns, quick-change comedians  
Tight-rope walkers and acrobats_

-Skinner balances himself on the edge of the table, walking the length of it-  
  
-Tom does a backflip-

Clez: -is all starry eyed-

Sethoz: -has dissolved into fangirl giggles-

Raven: -looks on the verge of hyper ventilation-

Skinner: _  
We have an extensive reputation_

Tom:   
_We make our home in Victoria Grove_

Skinner and Tom:_  
That is merely our center of operation  
__For we are incurably given to rove_

Skinner: -does a flip and lands on the ground, one hand on the floor, crouching like a cat-  
_We are very well known in __Cornwall__ gardens_

Tom: -does the same, and lands next to Skinner-  
_In Launcheston place _

Skinner:  
_And in Kensington square_

Tom: -straightens up while Skinner moves away-

Skinner: -moves away, to the window-

Tom and Skinner:  
_We have a really a little more reputation  
__Than a couple of cats can very well bear_

Skinner: -poses by the window-  
_If the rear window is found ajar_

Tom: -grins-  
_And the basement looks like a field of war  
__If a tile or two comes loose on the roof  
  
_Skinner: -grins also-  
_Which presently fails to be waterproof!__  
_  
Tom and Skinner: -regroup near the table-  
_If the drawers are pulled out from the bedroom chests  
__And you can't find one of your winter vests_

Skinner: -pulls from his pocket a pearl necklace-  
_If after supper one of the girls  
__Suddenly misses her Woolworth pearls  
__  
_Tom and Skinner:  
_Then the family will say:  
"It's that horrible cat —  
__It was Tom Sawyer or Rodney Skinner!"  
And most of the time they leave it at that.  
__Tom Sawyer and Rodney Skinner have a very unusual gift of the gab  
__  
_Tom: -picks the lock to a door-_  
We are highly efficient as cat burglars  
  
_Skinner: -makes a smashing movement-  
_As well as remarkable smart at smash-and-grab  
__We make our home in Victoria Grove _

Tom:  
_We have no regular occupation  
__  
_Tom and Skinner:  
_We are plausible fellows, and like to   
__Engage a friendly policeman  
__In conversation  
__When the family assemble for Sunday dinner  
__With their minds made up that they won't get thinner_

Tom:  
_On Argentine joint  
  
_Skinner:   
_Potatoes and greens_

Tom and Skinner:  
_The cook would appear from behind the scenes  
__  
_Tom:-puts his hand over his heart-  
_And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow: _

Skinner:  
_"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow_

Tom and Skinner: _  
For the joint has gone from the oven —  
__like__ that!"  
__Then the family will say:  
"It's that horrible cat —  
__Was it Tom Sawyer or Rodney Skinner?"  
and most of the time they leave it at that.  
__Tom Sawyer and Rodney Skinner  
__Have a wonderful way of working together_

Skinner:  
_And some of the time you would say it was luck  
  
_Tom: -points at window-  
_And some of the time you would say it was the weather   
_-a bolt of lighting can be seen, and a crash of thunder is heard-  
_  
_Tom and Skinner:  
_We go through the house like a hurricane_

Skinner: -holds up glass of sherry- _  
And no sober person could take his oath_

Tom and Skinner:  
_Was it Tom Sawyer — or Rodney Skinner?  
__Could you have sworn that it mightn't be both?  
  
_

Tom:_   
And when you hear a dining room **smash!**_

Skinner:   
_Or up from the pantry there comes a loud **crash! **_

Tom:  
_Or down from the library comes a long **ping! **_

Skinner: -holds up a Chinese vase-_  
From a vase which was commonly said to be Ming_

Tom and Skinner:  
_Then the family would say   
"Now which was which cat  
__It was Tom Sawyer and Rodney Skinner."   
And there's nothing at all to be done about that!  
___

_

* * *

_

**Song: **Mungojerrie and Rumpelteaser  
**Broadway: **Cats


	11. The Scarlet Pimpernel

This one is for Sethoz — she doesn't get appreciated enough! Cheers, m'dear!

* * *

Raven: -giggles madly, due to excess alcohol in her system- Did you know, that Sethoz once was crazy over the Scarlet Pimpernel?

Dorian: -whispers something about Sethoz to Jekyll-

Jekyll: -shakes head- Surely not!

Sethoz: -exasperated- Rave, what are you saying about me **now**?   
_Lud__ love me, such conjecturing   
Could drive a man insane!  
And I'm the one to set   
This gossip quite to rest   
The Pimpernel is me!   
  
_Dorian: -scoffs-  
_Indeed, and I'm the King of __Spain__! _

Raven: -shocked- **What?**_  
  
_

Dorian: -continues- _  
The Pimpernel is nothing   
But a nosy pest!   
  
_

Clez: -whacks him-

Jekyll: _  
No, the vicar says the Pimpernel's   
A bishop in disguise   
Who gives absolution   
Night and day! _

Nemo: _  
Stuff and nonsense! Don't you know?   
She's a maharajah from __Bombay__!   
  
_Mina and Skinner: _  
They say she has enormous feet!   
And that she tends to overeat!   
I've heard she's fussy with her food!   
And eats her breakfast in the nude! _

Sethoz: -chokes on her drink-

Ash and Clez: _  
Is she robust?   
Or very pale?   
At least we know she's female!   
Who is the Scarlet Pimpernel?   
  
_Tom:_  
Me auntie says her breath   
Is sweeter than an Irish rose!   
I'm sure I'd fall in love   
If she would cross my path! _

Clez: -glares at him- _  
La, yes if you could overlook   
The warts upon her nose! _

Sethoz: The **what **on my nose?!

Raven: _  
And possibly persuade her   
She should take a bath! _

Sethoz: -jaw drops-

Jekyll: _  
Rumor has it she's Castilian!   
And a reckless buccaneer!   
And I hear she carries sev'ral whips! _

Sethoz: Several w-whips?

Nemo: _  
She's a sultan from __Kabul__ —   
With men at her fingertips!   
  
_Mina: _  
They say she's nearly eight feet tall!   
And yet quite graceful — _

Raven: _  
Folderol!   
I'm told she waddles when she walks   
And often twitches when she talks! _

Ash: _  
Is she a dolt?   
She's very deep _

All:_  
Oh, Hellven's losing sleep!   
Who is this blasted Pimpernel?   
  
_Dorian: _  
The butcher in the village   
Claims he saw the girl last week! _

All others:  
_Where? _

Dorian: _  
Galloping a camel cross the moor!   
She's been seen — _

Sethoz: _   
Wearing full Sethoz green!   
I've told you all before!   
The fella's me!_

Ash: _  
It's Hermes the third! _

Jekyll: _  
Perhaps a convict run amok? _

Skinner: -throws up hands into the air- _  
This Pimpernel could be 'most any sod!_

Sethoz: How dare you? –looks ready to slap him-

Raven: -growls at her-

Sethoz: -doesn't hit him-

Clez: _  
Bite your tongue   
She is dashing and young! _

Raven and Ash: _  
The Pimpernel's a Muse!   
  
_Tom, Skinner and Jekyll: _  
And she'll find me!   
And she'll wake me   
And she'll take me _

Dorian: -smirks-_  
Down on a haystack _

Jekyll: _  
She'll face me   
Then at last you could tell   
  
_

Skinner:  
_If she's a hero or a nun _

Tom:  
_A fiddling Nero or a drunk _

All:  
_Who is the Scarlet Pimpernel?   
  
_Dorian: _  
I'm sure she's flatulent and crass   
Here, here! The girl's a horse's ass! _

Raven and Clez: _  
No, no! She is neighbourly and kind _

Ash:_  
But quite erotically inclined..._

Sethoz: -blinks-

All: _  
Whatever guise she may employ   
She's __Hellven's __pride and joy!   
This plucky non-peril   
Is lucky bloody swell!   
Who is the Scarlet Pimpernel???__  
_

Sethoz: -sighs- Lud, am I the only one who's not drunk here?

* * *

**Song: **The Scarlet Pimpernel  
**Broadway: **The Scarlet Pimpernel

Just so you know, the Scarlet Pimpernel is a wicked book. Go read it! I recommend it! Better yet, go watch the musical or download the songs...it rocks!


	12. INTERMISSION

I hope dear Ash De Brie won't come after me if I use this song, 'cause I really have no idea one to use. This is for Singapore's 39th birthday…go Singapore!

* * *

The scene is that of a grassy hill, and we're standing atop of it. Below the hill is a grassy plane, and there are gray dots all over the field. We're too far up to see what they are, exactly, but slowly we move downwards, towards the field. As we get closer, we see a small sign at the edge of all the gray tombstones. The writing on it is faded, but one word can still be made out: "cemetery".

The gray tombstones are usually unadorned; but not today. Today, on each grave marker, there is a Singapore flag. Only half of them have flags, but there is a person who is putting the flags on each stone.

Raven: -puts another flag on another tombstone-  
_Left your faith in what you most believe in  
One city, one family  
Trust your heart  
Let fate decide  
To guide these lives we see_

Raven: -straightens and looks at the city in the distance-  
_A paradise made by man  
Within this world blessed with love  
A simple life, we live in peace  
_-She goes back to putting the flags on the graves-

Ash: -stands under the only tree in the field, holding a orchid-  
_Softly tread the sand below your feet now  
Two worlds, one family  
Trust your heart  
Let fate decide  
To guide these lives we see_  
  
Clez: -stands next to Ash, holding a stuffed lion-  
_Beneath the shelter of the trees  
Only love can enter here  
A simple life, we live in peace_  
  
-Five planes zoom overhead, streaming white and red smoke-  
  
Raven: -looks up at the sky-  
_Raise your head up  
Lift high the load  
Take strength from those that need you  
Build high the walls  
Build strong the beams  
A new life is waiting  
But danger's no stranger here_  
  
Sethoz: -stands in the middle of a crowd, all wearing red and white-  
_No words describe a mother's tears  
No words can heal a broken heart  
A dream is gone, but where there's hope_  
  
Raven:_  
Somewhere something is calling for you  
One city, one family  
Trust your heart  
Let fate decide  
To guide these lives we see__.  
_-looks up at the sky-  
Live long, Singapore!

* * *

**Song:** Two Worlds  
**Movie:** Tarzan  
  
I'm a proud Singaporean, despite my plans to move out of the country when I'm old enough. This is for my beloved homeland...may many years of prosperity guide your steps!


End file.
